SARTRE WARS

1:38 am

Dr. Leuzz:

I sit upon the box of socks, the rounded box, it tips and rocks.
Again up late in altered state, far from sedate and so I wait
On coke I fed, watch moai head, and as I've said, I have no bed
With heavy mind I wake the line and CD shines, it's coredump time

It's definately about time I bought a bed. I still haven't ever done that. I slept on the floor in Portland until someone else couldn't stand it anymore and installed a foam futon in my room. In Hawaii, my apartment came with a bed. (And a desk!) I managed to provide my own desk in Oregon, so maybe this time I will graduate to a bed and chair. I think I've picked a bed. It matches my desk's oh-so-kraftwerk black tubular metal construction. The next step is a chair, so I don't have to sit on a box of socks anymore. (These darn socks. They're all black, but none of them match.)

Jimbo has got me all thinking again. It's true that there isn't a right way to go about living your life. What is living your life besides trying to get the things you want? That pursuit of happiness thing, is that the point of life? It might as well be, since it is constitutionally protected. Surely, ah...uh...well, I know I must be reinventing a wheel which is already obsolete. Or proven wrong or whatever. Empirically. By geniuses. Armies of them!

Haze! You have chosen to be wrong along with me! -- Rev. Zoweee Wow, KSC

I guess if everything you do is directed towards either getting what you want, or finding out what you want (which, really, is redundant), you're just like everyone else. Who am I to judge whether any given tactic is good or bad? That doesn't mean I will respond well to manipulation or intimidation, but I won't blame you for trying, anymore.

So how does this help me get what I want? Why do I worry about whether I'm seeing things clearly? Well... if I'm really lucky, I will discover that what I want is for everything to be the way it is. Why pursue romantic entanglements if you know that brief affairs make you much, much happier? Why look for expertise in a highly valued field if you know that you love doing something else? Czar! It's better than spending money trying to synthesize the happiness and fulfillment you would have had if you were doing something you yearn to do. Yearn! Yamatron!

When nine hundred years old you reach, look as good you will not. --Yoda

I am afraid that my heavy butt is going to destroy this box of socks in under a week. I need a chair soon. If I follow the same philosophy that matched me with the Anthro desk, I will wind up with an Aeron Chair. There's an Aeron chair at the furniture store up the block. It's on the second floor in an atrium by itself, flattered with a small dais/pedestal contruct, and illuminated from all angles above by brilliant pinpoint spotlights. This setup makes me think it is sort of pricey. It is.

(Actually I probably will not buy a nine hundred dollar chair, if only because other things (constant dental agony, car, electronic technology) come first and I prefer to not be a huge fuX0ring idiot all the time.)

This is great. Ed plays boompy techno music at top volume for hours and the neighbors don't take mind. Play a single SID at a fractional volume at 1:46 am, though...I just heard all the neighbors close their windows. Too bad Ed borrowed my headphones (I don't know why) (for the second day in a row). I don't mind lending my stuff out once in a while. I do mind lending my stuff out more than that. Three days in a row is more than that, so we might see some contention tomorrow.

In conclusion, if everyone knew immediately and accurately whether a given action would get them closer to or further away from What They Wanted the world would (be great)/(die quickly).

So many machine rooms in this building. If there's a fire, I'll be trapped in a towering halon bong.--ASD