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CMPXCHG8B!
11:51 pm:
Acutely aware of every word uttered by other people in proximity to my name, I spend a lot of time pondering after someone writes something about me. I'm not thinking about them, oh no. I'm thinking about myself, as usual. The attention reminds me that there is a perceived 'me' in existence. I don't know a whole lot about this "Andrew" fellow that other people know about, as I never see him. He is intriguing, however, so I read and re-read everything that is written about him, sifting for clues as to what he's like.
I'm expending energy trying to stay away from the notion that I can CHANGE this perceived Andrew. Really, he isn't my responsibility. I'm only supposed to live my life from the inside. Manipulating other people (and/or myself) would cause me to be less happy, more worried, and more distracted. Would? Does. Anyway.
Why make your life more complicated? You might as well set yourself on fire. --Tara
I've gotten over whatever illness I had last, thanks for the advice, you. I'm still light-headed, though. Either I'm getting used to it, or it's getting slightly less intense, but I'm definately more dizzy and more detached from my physical being (than usual). It happened suddenly on Monday, two weeks ago. Ah well. Probably, uhm.. menopause.
The other day I bought "Leftism" by Leftfield. They only ever put out one album, but it's very good. They bring in people such as Johhny "Rotten" Lydon, and that chick from Curve, whatever her name is. I still have "Inspection (check one)" running through my head.
I had the "Career Dream" while getting better from being sick. I was climbing an extremely steep hill, and my legs had been damaged somehow. Still, I was dragging myself upwards, over an extremely uneven sidewalk. I recognized the hill. Kalali St.. It's not really that bad, but it is quite a walk for a second grader. I lived nearly at the end of Nahewai St. at that age.
He is much stronger than the elevator doors. -- Old Chinese woman, after Devin narrowly escaped getting on the wrong elevator.
My little brother just graduated from High School. I can't be in Hawaii to see him wearing a square hat and purple gown and forty pounds of flowers and leis of various categories. I was able to assemble and configure his graduation present, a Pentium II 233. Much MUCH faster than my personal computer. Now he can lock himself in a room and learn about programming and systems. Orrr put up a webpage. Hmm. And play subspace or tanarus or something against me! I can beat him up again! yay!
Happy Birthday (last week) to Firedrake, and I guess it was also my birthday, but I pretty much forgot.