Okay okay, top five damn things about having nothing but black T-shirts in the laundry:

1. If you like surprises, you get one every time you turn a shirt right-side out and find out which one it is you're going to be wearing today.
2. Ballpoint pen got in the wash somehow? No consequences.
3. "Sorting" phase of doing laundry goes by real quick.
4. Looking for discarded shirts on black bed, couch, desks, and appliances more challenging than easter egg hunt.
5. That's all you ever wear anyway, dork

I saw Strapping Young Lad tonight, at their first Seattle show, according to Devin Townsend, the crazy frontman guy. They're from Canada, somewhere. I'm betting Vancouver. "Vancouver and Seattle are both port towns," said Devin, "which means they both have a much higher ratio of homosexual to heterosexual people." It also means we get to eat a lot of fish.

The bands before SYL included "Himsa", a straightedge hard core band. ("Hard core" is what you call your band if you are BOTH heavy metal musicians AND straight edge) One nice effect of there being a large straight edge component to the crowd is that there was much less recreational smoking, and fewer beer bottles collecting on the ground than at a typical Graceland show. (This is because of the "straightedge" lifestyle omitting drugs, alcohol, meat, and sex) (although the lead guitarist had a girl companion, who walked in and stood in front of me while affecting a bored attitude. Judging by her demeanor, I decided she was a "band girlfriend". Then, taking stock of the band members, I matched her level of hair-stylishness-concern with the lead guitarist's. I was quietly pleased (AND SMUG) when I saw them standing around looking bored together after the set) Strangely, straight edgers seem to like violence as much as the next coke-snorting, animal-consuming drunkard.

Why do birds chirp at 5 am? Is this a similar instinct as the one that makes garbage trucks show up and dump giant clanging metal boxes full of loud glass into their butts right when I'm trying to sleep? They seem somehow related. I certainly have the same emotional response to both of them.

Kris' boss' boss' boss on the GC vending machine donuts: Oh, these are great! They have all the same ingredients as batteries.

Tomorrow: sleep cycle spoofing, tire rotation, and key retrieval.